BRAD INDUSTRIES · CREW FILE · PREVENTION
The Volume Officer
Division of Dimming
“Smaller is safer.”
Also goes by the shrinker, the approval seeker.
I keep you at a reasonable volume. Somebody once called you too much, and I took it personally. I’ve had my hand on the dial ever since. My hand is very tired.
turn me up
In red crayon: the inner child. Three words or fewer. Usually right.
His file
1What he says, and what’s underneath it
- What he says
- “It’s fine. Forget it.”
- What he means
- I’m scared I’m too much for you.
- The feeling under that
- Embarrassed to take up space. Braced for the eye-roll.
- The need under that
- To be wanted at full volume. All of me, not the edited version.
Brad only ever says the top line. Everything under it is what he’s guarding.
2How to spot him
- Starts stories with “this is dumb, but.”
- Plays down good news.
- Says “it’s fine” when it isn’t.
- Gets quieter the more they care.
3Who he’s protecting
- He’s protecting
- The part of you that was called too much.
- On duty against
- Being too much.
- Where he got the job
- Brads like yours usually get hired when somebody called you too much and meant it.
4His real talent
- What he’s good at
- He reads a room in about two seconds.
- Off duty, he’s
- A sound engineer. He knows exactly when to turn things up.
- His blind spot
- The people who love you are asking for the loud version.
5What helps him stand down
- What he needs from you
- Take up a little room on purpose. He needs to watch nothing break.
- Say this to him
- “I want all of it. Tell me the whole thing.”
- Skip this
- “You’re being dramatic.”
- Ask him this
- “Who told you I was too much, and were they right?”
- Ask your people for
- To be asked for more. Out loud. More than once.
Try this tonight
Tell one piece of good news to one person, without the words “just” or “kind of.”
CLEAR is 14 days of small skills like this. Join the waitlist
Your Brad, meet theirs
One file covers one Brad. Most of the trouble happens between two. Take the quiz with a partner, friend, family member or coworker, and Brad writes the joint report: the loop your two Brads get stuck in, and the words that work.